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Tenet of B #3: Idle conversation is masturbation for the mind; like masturbation it is a self-centered and ultimately useless activity.



Great Moments in Internet Personal Ad History, part 1

Believe it or not, we here at FUD do sometimes have a softer side... I used to work for one of the biggest internet personals sites as an ad reviewer/supervisor, and this job was endlessly amusing. We used to keep log files of attractive people to show everyone else, and we also kept logs of the most retarded, disturbing, or just plain depressing ads. You can take a guess at which file was bigger... it's the one being posted up here by me right now. I'd like to say this file took years or even months to compile, but it was really only a matter of weeks. Enjoy the fruits of our collective labors below. The only editing I will be doing is to remove contact information or references to the site these were posted on, as I don't feel like being harassed by them.

Be advised, a lot of these ads use HIGHLY OFFENSIVE language (moreso than the average FUD page),
including racial slurs and incredibly sexually explicit descriptions. You've been warned.

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meet me

a female friend to play. on line and maybe off. oh iam married and love my hubby much.. i love women and he likes it too.

i a man sae no gud but allah

hi i'm mohmed from mansura city in egypt i need to meet true love in a woman she's know islam and sae from her haert la elah ela allah wa ina mohamed rsool allah and know what is love

looking for a lady to marriage

my name is habibu,leaving in nigeria.a guy who need a serious lady 2 marriage.if u are d typer pls write me with my email

i am seeking a life patner

hey any girl wana marry me,hello to all i am pardeep from ludhiana, india . i am a comp flat knitting master in a reputed hosiery in ludhiana . i wana a real life patner for ever.

ready for all of you

I want any one who wnts me even if i'm married.He never has to know.He dosnot cheat but I do so call me. (***)586-9844 I like to shop so I can look good for my other man.

CHEATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have a girlfriend who i live with who has no idea that i am on this dating site, i lie to her all the time and talk to as many chicks as possible on about 10 different sites. when she is sleepin mostly i am line lookin to have a good time. I am a sneek and a really good lier and i like to use as many women at one time as possible. so if you like what you hear look me up. bye the way Kennith you r busted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(love yr girlfriend) you know the one you do not have.

sexy slim kelly looking for saucy male

im looking for a male who no how to treat a lady right and not a slim ball im a very bubble person with s strong sense of huma

Painter seeks no one!

Blah, blah, blah, I'm sure I will not ever say anything that you want to hear. And that makes me smile.

I'm a painter, which means I'm moody, crazy, controlling, don't delegate well, and like sick dirty jokes. So you see, I'm not for you. I'll drive you crazy with my pointless BS, and you'll drive me crazy with your inability to be funny enough and or wise enough. So why don't we save everyone involved a headache and just not bother.

Brush your teeth boys.

Looking for friends

I am a Japanese.
I am studying English for you !

My hobby is a drive.
I have a domestic A grade license of a car competition.
I want to become a movie director in the future.
Now, I earn a fund to study abroad.
I work for six days in a week for 14 hours on a day.

I want to make a lot of friends all over the world.
If you have interest to me or Japanese friend, Please contact me!

I want to become a character of the history of your life.

seeks submissive female

Hi
I am a DOMINANT, white male and part of a dominant couple what we seek is a female slave submissive to serve us in any way that we see fit (ie but not limited to B&D/D&S,spankings,servitude,blindfolds, gags and maybe even caged.

You will serve us in all way (and yes even financial abuse).You MUST be OVER 21 years of age and willing to relocate to The ohio area. Yes an "interview" will be reqiured and this can take several days. All races are welcome to apply.

Ok here's what we are seeking in a submissive/slave female. She should be at least 21 years of age and perefrably still breathing. She should have no children (or they must be grown and on their own) She should be single,divorced,widowed. Her height and weight should be in realitive proportion to each other(a few pounds over is acceptable)She MUST be able to relocate to me within two weeks of being accepted.

na

have fun play games go palces like sex wer a girls play a games wer girls and go palces wer girls and go to the park and city

GOD loveing man seeks GOD loveing women

im a christen man looking for a christen women im a very out going guy i love the out doors my faviort time of the year is fall i love to go fishing and i dont care if i chatch anything just being out thear and talking to JESUS i love to go to parks festelbels old country towns and spending time whith loved ones and i love to help other pepole if i can if i cant i will find someone who can i just want to live a good christen life

I'm not happy Bob, nooooot happy

in a baaaad marriage staying because thats what a husband/father does. not looking to date just looking. dreams of happiness are better than no dreams at all

A True love with a True heart

I in need of true love, A true heart that will care and keep my promise. Am such a gentle girl, that is how i feel about myself. But some people do tell me am beautiful and sweet but i always think is a flatter, cos i'm someone dissappointed sometimes by the way they feel about me because all they want is their desires

i am verysmily are oyu

my nama ıs yüksel i m from çankiri.my ega 29 are you.my langucs turkis,mongolis and englis,i want smelly,carekters,beatuful,no wars freands i; kiss all........................

My PErsonal Profile

Hello every1 this is my profile pl im a imple person i like simplicity.pl look into it if u feel like replying mepldo reply me i will b waiting for ur reply

am seeking for honest loverto settled

am a sweeties bebe very understand , am gift am into business, lingerie,and model,am 25 year am serious minded , honest truthfull, need an honest to settle down with my parents are abit rich but their have die contact me kjljlkjljlkjlkk@ yahoo.com for more informat the onlyt brother is a military man

rahamtwit seeks grumpy gina

my appearance is grey i have a huge stomach with a huge belly button in it and i hat fat women eho have brown hair and gold rings

lonenely male looking for love

single attractive male with short light brown hair blue eyes to die for olive tanned skin average height with athletic build who loves outdoor activities such as bbqs beach activities playing sports but most of all loves making his women happyp.s also absolutelyloves his sex loves touching caressing fondling kissing hugging licking making love with his women not just sex lots of foreplay twice daily would be nice but would settle for once daily

Hello !!!!

Nice, young, sociable the woman. I like
To read, I am fond of music, it is a little sports.
I wish to create family with the financially secure person which can
To contain our future family.
Get creative and get noticed
All at correspondence. Ask, if that is interesting.
On all questions I promise to give the answer.
I the good boy. I search the friend.

Sexy Mr Singh

I am a fresh Mr Singh who is very clever and as you can see unbelievably handsome. My assests are big with a helmet the size of a light bulb! If you want real love or simply a servicing that your local ford garage cannot give. I AM the Mr Singh that you want! Give me a bell

surf babe need serf rookie

I am friendly,lovely person I need long time relation ship and whome understand me and make me laugh.I am just in the corner waiteing you.

sharemewithmywife

Hi what to say this is my wife idea she wants me to find a nice person to have an affair with as i have a large sex drive.So im looking for the other woman so if you are looking for a man but dont want to be tied down then i guess im the one for you. Any way if your intrested drop me a line and we will take it from there

hotguy wants cute gurl

hi im ish want a gurl who is sexy smart and want to a party animale wit me im 22/m/ind .im a student want to hav sex wit a hot babe who lives near my house hold in the range of 100 km . plz do contact me im tall smart n handsome guy .bye

ESOGORGOZ SEEK A WEMAN

I SEEK A GOOD WOMAN I AM A POSTGADGUATE STUDENT AND I AM ALONE.I,D LIKE MY PARTNER WOULD HAVE SATISFIED ME.I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU.

risp seek a sexy

she must be very sexy.she must open minded. big hole between her legs.can tolerate my long thick baba for long time continuousely.

Mistress seeks...

I am a tall Dominant blonde and busty Lady who has decided it is time to create a select stable of submissive males for My pleasure.I have always been the Dominant partner in My previous relationships and have decided that it is time to have more than one generous submissive male at My beck and call to assist Me to maintain My lifestyle. I have a DD chest and shaven pussy that require a lot of oral attention by generous finacially secure males who realise that their purpose in life is to please and amuse Me. Those males must relish the thought of having My whip used on whatever part of their anatomy I feel like using, before I use one of My various strap ons to ensure their total submission.
I am only interested in submissive males who wish to genuinely serve and please a Dominant Lady or with her sexy bi girly slut and very hot bi transexual. You should have no expectation of ever having penetrative sex with Me or My girls. You are here to amuse and pleasure Me. You must want to submit to My every whim, to worship My leather boots, My gorgeous big breasts and shaven pussy. To suffer whatever pain and or humiliation I feel like inflicting on you, including feminisation, cbt, strap ons and whips to mention just a few of My more standard uses of your body.

looking for friend/ wrestling partner

I am looking for a wrestling partner for fun, exercise and competition. I like to wrestle in shorts, no shirt to submission. Wrestling is my favorite sport and I hope to find someone else who enjoys the same. I am also looking for a good friend at the same time. I am a very discreet gay man who has never acted on his feelings. Wrestling is a great way to get some man-to-man contact.

I WORK AT DEL TACO!!!

I'm really only 5'0 and I weigh about 325 lbs. I wear thick glasses and I dont take care of my teeth. I never heard of "deoderant" before and I seldom take showers. My face is covered with warts and acne too! A six-pack is so old school, a gallon of milk is whats hot right now! I buy most my clothes from Big Lots! Nothin says stylin like Gitano Jeans. Beyond physicals I consider myself a very selfish and greedy person. I'm very impatient and I get mad really really easy. I will blow up at the littlest things. When I go to the movies I looove talking really really loud! At dinner I'll chew with my mouth open and let the food fly. All you gold-diggers will be glad to know that I make $7 an hour working at Del Taco! It's not easy living the high life. Oh I'm also a drug addict and alcoholic. I can be abusive both verbally and physically when under the influence. I'm the type of guy that will forget your birthday and disappear for days. My hobbies include, Star Trek, Dungeons and Dragons, recording episodes of Buffy and of course eating! I sweat while I'm eating too! I don't have a car or a cell phone but I'm sure you won't mind me borrowing yours all the time. I'm so gangsta! I know you want some of this...don't be shy!

Let's play a'round

This gentleman loves to swing. I am seeking an attractive, athletic female who loves the same. I am an avid golfer who plays as often as I can get away with....morning, noon or evenings. I take very good care of my equipment and it is in great shape. My driver is long, with a stiff shaft and an oversized head. My balls are always clean. Looking for a swinging female to play around with. Also willing to accomodate a threesome or foursome, so feel free to bring your friends. Your equipment should be clean and well taken care of. Please take careful note; I do not find "old bags" very attractive and I will not play with them.

FREDDY

THE PARTY LIKES ME TO MI THE FRIENDS THE AMUSEMENT, I LOVE THE WOMEN AND THE MASTER
I ENTER TO NAVIGATE IN INTERNET FOR THAT I LIKE TO TALK WITH LIBERAL FRIENDS AND THAT THEY LIKE THE SEX

Hello voluptuous ladies

Hello to all the BBWs and voluptuous ladies! I am looking for ladies who would love to strap one on and give it to me! Preferably large, lovely ladies who are experienced at this or who would like to try something new. Send me a photo and we'll go from there.

nice guy with egde

iam a chubby boy that willing to go out with some one that has older that will look at me as a lover not not because iam young i need some one

A Real Munsen

Do you have a great ass? Do you stare at it sometimes in the mirror and want to slap it? Are you looking for a man to worship that ass? Then look no further. I have years of ass-worshipping experience as well as breasts and leg worshipping. If your not interested or you think im a pig, well im probably not for you. Maybe you need a boyfriend who doesnt care how you look... and rightfully so. Also, if you think im not joking than we probably wont get along.

WHATS HAIRY AND HANGS OUT YOUR PAJAMAS?

snoopy,he man,mickey mouse, superman,top cat, deputy dog,dangermouse, this is easy ill think of 120 characters in no time !

fun loving guy

some one who enjoys giving blo jobs , dosent mind swallowing , takes it up the back doors, and hasnt got any balls woman will do nicely.

Soldier looking for Mr Perfect!

I have recently come out of the closet and told all my family and friends that i am a complete homer. I have also recently joined my local pornography club and would love a kinky lady to come with me. I have bright red hair but i shave it off cause i like my gay bold head. I age rapidly at about an average of 2 weeks per hour. I currently look about 100 years old.

My last partnership was with a horse named Barry. We lasted 4 years until he cheated on me with a goat. I was distraught.

man of action

just a few word's about my self,am a sexual man that come from from Nigeria,west african, but ilive in Roma iTaly, iwant a sexual woman that live's in this(Europa)or in U,S,A.because ilike what (U;S,women do's when you get them badly,in action.butnot you will use drog or smok,only your numel power

Stephanie seeks a manly man

I'm smart, fun, naughty, sexy and very playful. I have 42D's big arse, big putty, and smal cl*t. I like cyber. I am recently involved with a boyfriend.

Ura seeks nice girl

I not very much am high, Evropeyskoy exterior. I like to hurry at mornings, I carry with computers.Modern music is liked

sexxxxx

I like music, movies and restaurants an group sex, im st8 9 inches placer for the woman i fell a woman like the best of creation and the sex is the second

-----Just looking for a friend

I am a laid back guy that hates drama. I am trying to find someone that is not only cute but also has a personality! So if you want to chill, watch movies, or just go out -- holla at me
this is his fiance, well ex fiance because i just found out that he was searching for someone like 5 minutes ago, he is an asshole, his shit will be out of my apartment tonight, so he will probably need somewhere to stay!!!!!!!!!
and that picture of the monte carlo, he ain't even got that shit no more!!! he sold it, he doesn't have shit!!!!! including me now!!!!

More About Me

Hobbies
sex sexx sexxx give me sex im happy and when i dont get im sad so please keep me happy...

Latest News
i just love to suck and ride cock all night long and me and my mom karen like to team up so call me and moms is 471-9958 see you soon...P.S we love it Doggy style and we both have real long ha
Favorite Quote
Fuck em Hard and Suck em Dry Give me your Juice and i wont Cry...

*THE PERSONALS SITE* sucks big time.........lol

Fuck you assholes !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

a whole lotta lovin ;-)

im large and i lov men preferably not wite ones i love churvh and sex preferably dirty sanchezzes please break my cherry jk ice i love to chat so break my ice but not wite men maybe wihte wommen

For your Eyes Only


Im 27 years old , born in Miami florida , Im a bisexual Shemale ! yes ! and I enjoy ben bisexual , i can do both sexes ! but i prefer womans for Discret Dates .

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